#62: Random Rhyming

This is the first poem I wrote that left me with my hand cramped. Sometimes the mind moves faster then the pen. I decided to try rhyming whatever was coming in to my head as quickly as possible. This is what came out. It's not very refined but it was fun to write.

http://theawkwardyeti.com/tag/rhyme/

When you strain to explain this pain you realize again that life isn't a game. 

Your enemies have awoken, unspoken rules have been broken and you lost control of the moment. 

Your rise, your demise, your lows and your highs controlled by the very things you despise, 

the unwise are surprised by the worlds lies.

But not even those who are smart see the truth from the start, 

for they close their eyes and harden their hearts.

And all you can be is yourself, there is no power to gain or worldly wealth. 

Don’t give in to quick fix thrills, whether powder or pills, your ills remain ills whether you’re high or you’re still, nothing here will fulfill, just try to comprehend what is real. 

You live and you die but not on our timetable, it's an unstable fable and we all are unable, 

to wrap our finger around this big picture puzzle. 

They say don’t even try cause you’ll end up with your brain fried or with your mouth open wide as your theories collide and your logic slides to the illogical side your mind can’t hide, just like your body, its along for the ride. 

So what is there left to do with this pain we can’t push through. 

Do we turn toward the things we yearn, or do we listen to what we have learned, that things we earn will in the end burn, so we better discern what type of life we will lead, 

cause when we no longer bleed, we will still have a need,but no longer to succeed, as God judges my deeds and misdeeds, what will I plead?

#61: The Soul

Spoiler Alert if you haven't seen Blade Runner (it is 30 years old though)

Can a Replicant have a soul? What about an animal, or a clone?

My favorite speech in film comes from the movie Blade Runner. These are the last words of the villain Roy Batty, who isn't human, but a Replicant. On earth, Replicant's are considered illegal and dangerous and are to be killed immediately. Roy Batty had nothing but hatred towards humans due to their hatred towards him. His final act though, is one of heroism as he saves the life of the man who had been hunting him. As Roy is about to die, he says a few words to his hunter. 

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears...in...rain. Time to die."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HU7Ga7qTLDU

His final words and actions capture both the significance and insignificance of his life. His act of saving the hunter's life will have eternal repercussions, but at the same time, they will be lost in time just like everything else he has ever done.

I wonder what happens to his soul? Does he even have a soul since he is a Replicant and not a human? I don't know how the soul works really, but below is a poem about my questions regarding the soul 

Rutger Hauer as Replicant Roy Batty in Blade Runner

On this musing I find confusing, on the definition of the soul

If I made a machine with love so keen, would it be considered whole?

Are animals lesser than their human oppressor? This I can’t comprehend

If a person despised suddenly dies, would his soul find a similar end?

Can a soul be found with no body around, and if so, by what means does it roam?

If a man so kind has lost his mind, where does his soul find its home?

When lips can’t mutter what the soul wants to utter, are the words still true at its source?

Can there be a place beyond outer space for the soul when the body has run its course?

Can words be spoken to a soul that’s broken to make it perfect and new?

Then I surmise that before my demise, I should figure out what my soul should do.

#60: Back to the Nest (Part 3)

Thanks again to Chris Tan and Drew Tan for coming up with the ending to this poem. Its way better then it would have been if I tried to come up with my own ending. Here it is below.

Time would pass to darkness

Another rising sun

Her body now felt paralyzed

She couldn't even run

Too tired now to shiver

Too worn out to even breathe

Death now imminently close

But this world she cannot leave

She gathers all her energy

For one more glorious chirp

One last defiant act

At death upon this earth

A giant creature approaches

An animal unknown

Warmth oh warmth and gentleness 

From the giant is what’s shown.

Effortlessly floating

In a soft cocoon

This giant so tenderly rescuing her 

From her certain doom

A familiar sound is heard

Mama perks her ears

Her baby birds are singing

It brought mama bird to tears.

Home sweet home never felt truer

Then here with her family

Eternally she’d be thankful

For this giant’s humility

#59: Back to the Nest (Part 2)

This poor bird with it's broken wing. The bird's pain may be physical, but her despair is for her babies. Her determination and persistence is not to find relief, but to find home, to find her family. She knows that if she can't make it home, her baby birds will not survive. Sometimes, reality is grim, and the stakes are high. I admire this birds guts.

Here is part 2. Next week is the conclusion. Will she find her way home?

Bird with Broken Wing by Barbara Banthien

Persistent and determined

A glare glazed across her eyes

This moment of great trial

Would not become her own demise

She plucked some worms out from the mud 

With her weary beaten beak

The storm had softened up the ground

Making the worms easy to seek

She then marched aimlessly

Hoping to find her nest

Sadly she was lost 

This had become a hopeless quest

As tears streamed down her cheek

It wasn't from the pain,

It was from the thought that she 

Would never be home again
Her babies were her pride and joy

She loved them oh so much

But they would have to carry on,

Without a mothers touch.

Not a promising scenario

They likely won’t survive

Mama chose to keep on searching

Her motherly sense of pride

Wandering for hours

Homes still not in sight

The overbearing pain

Now adding to her plight

Alas her tank on empty

Her body exhausted and weak

She fell to the ground with nothing left

Survival looking bleak

#58: Back to the Nest (Part 1)

Last year, while visiting northern California to see my brothers family, and visit some old friends from college, I wrote a couple poems. The first was one I posted a couple weeks ago called "Monsters in the Night" and was a pretty quick write. The other one I wrote was a struggle. Though most of it was written while up in Northern California, I couldn't think of how to finish the poem. 

I was spending the day visiting Chris Tan whom I had the chance to disciple while working with Epic at UC Davis, and Drew Tan, who I had the privilege of leading a Bible Study with in Epic. These are two very close friends who I admire greatly. 

We met up in San Francisco for lunch and I was telling them about this poem I was writing about a mother bird who leaves her nest to go get worms. The bird unfortunately crashes while hunting for worms and can no longer fly. I was about 3/4 done with the poem, but still had no ending. As Chris, Drew and myself were talking about the possible themes that could come from the poem, they gave me a great idea on how to finish it. Their idea blew my mind it was so good. It completely changed the tone of the poem in a brilliant way. The ending was now in my head thanks to Drew and Chris, but I couldn't find the right words to use. It was a severe case of writers block. Eventually I found the words but I find it's a bit unrefined. 

Anyways, since its kind of long, I broke it down in to three parts. Here is part one. 

Mama bird she wakes up 

Before the rising sun

She has food to find 

So much to be done

Her chicklets resting calmly 

Soon will need to eat

To feed her babies daily 

Is not an easy feat

She goes out to the river

Her mind is on the hunt

She needs to raise her babies

Even the little runt

Soaring through the air 

She hits a gust of wind

It blows her off her course

Into a tailspin

Hopelessly she’s flapping 

She hit a Douglas fir

The ground approaching fast

It must have been a blur

Left now bruised and bleeding 

With a broken wing as well

She had no idea

To how far she truly fell.

She dusted herself clean

And tried to fly around

But the moment she took off

She fell back towards the ground

Her left wing would flap frantically 

But the right one wouldn't move

Nature dealt a crushing blow

Of which cruelty approved

Mama bird still had no food 

And she no longer could fly

Could she reach her baby birds 

Or would this be her last goodbye?

#57: The Weight of His Glory

1 John 4:8 - Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

This verse if worth pondering on Valentines day. I would think that anything that is glorious and beautiful could not exist if love did not exist.

The weight of His glory, comparable only to the measure of His splendor

To the far reaching grasp of His grace, to the knowledge of His endless wonder

For the sweetness of honey cannot compare

To the sweetness of mercy that rescues from despair

For the depths of my sin leads my soul to decay

And the filth in my heart leads me far from His ways

But the Cross brings forth an everlasting light

That purifies my soul so I am holy in His sight

As His light illuminates all the things I have ignored

There is no hiding my iniquities, iniquities he abhors

But through forgiveness I can wash all that I have stained

But not by my own doing, but by the Lord’s infinite strength.

#56: Monsters in the Night

There is a quiet calm in the stillness of the night

An eerie air to breath, creates a certain fright

The kids are tucked away, snuggled in their bed

But the parents wide awake, a foreboding sense of dread

Pajamas were their armor, with pillows as their shield

They grabbed all their weapons, their house a battlefield

Trampling through the hallway, monsters coming round

Mom and dad are waiting, ready to knock the baddies down

First came the water monster, making dry beds to turn to wet

They are tricky ones to stop, unless you have a special net

Armed with a bag of sponges, to sop the monster up

They soaked him up real good, and trapped him in a cup

Then came the noisy monster, amplifying the night sound

He made it seem like raccoon's, were all rummaging around

To defeat him meant that silence, would be the order of the hour

Ear plugs along with ear muffs, proved to be a mighty power

Then came the pitch dark monster, impossible to see

Scaring children senseless, not knowing where he’d be

The darkness is combated, by a teeny bit of light

It let the children see around in the middle of the night

Then came the bright light monster, who seemed brighter than the sun

Darkness was the only option for this battle to be won

There is only one way known, to stop this bright charade

They’d cover up the monster, with a yellowish lampshade

Lastly came the nightmare monster, invading children’s dreams

He would creep in late at night, scaring the precious little things

There is no stopping him for this monster is a ghost

The parents here are helpless I guess the kiddies then are toast

But thankfully when this monster comes, it isn't very strong

Because in the waking world, this monster does not belong.

And if the children wake, with sleepless eyeballs red

They know they can always jump in to mommy and daddy’s bed